This week I am reconnecting with my spiritual self. I am exploring how the Source (be that God, Fate or the Universe) provides if we simply know how to ask. I'm no stranger to this concept; I've encountered The Secret and other such teachings on manifesting, and have my own beliefs on how Flow works. I should, therefore, be primed, mentally prepared for these tasks.
My inner cynic is afoot. Every day this week he has jumped out and screamed "sabotage!" in my face. I am my own worst enemy when it comes to believing in myself, never mind in a greater good. My confidence is continually being tested, my ability questioned along with my worth.
But I know something greater than myself has to be at work. I feel and see the changes. When I create I have purpose, my life has meaning. I am happiest when writing, performing or singing — being my creative self.
I've spent the night pouring my heart out to David who understands my frustrations and concerns. He reminded me that little of it actually matters. The things I've been fixating about are in fact low priority goals for the future or experiences best left in the past; what matters right now is staying grounded and doing as good a job as I can of what's happening in the present.
I'm very grateful to have supportive people in my life right now. I don't have to struggle on my own.